Joke : The Pilots
A plane leaves Los Angeles airport under the control of a Jewish captain. His copilot is Chinese. It’s the first time they’ve flown together, and an awkward silence between the two seems to indicate a mutual dislike.
Once they reach cruising altitude, the Jewish captain activates the auto-pilot, leans back in his seat, and mutters, “I don’t like Chinese.”
“No rike Chinese?” asks the copilot, “….why not?”
“You people bombed Pearl Harbor, that’s why!”
No, no,” the co-pilot protests, “Chinese not bomb Peahl Hahbah! That Japanese, not Chinese.”
“Japanese, Chinese, Vietnamese… doesn’t matter, you’re all alike!”
There’s a few minutes of silence.
“I no rike Jews either!” the copilot suddenly announces. “Oh yeah, why not?” asks the captain.
“Jews sink Titanic.”
“What? That’s insane! Jews didn’t sink the Titanic!” exclaims the captain, “It was an iceberg!”
“Iceberg, Goldberg, Greenberg, Rosenberg, … no mattah… all same!
I got another joke for you.
A plane was taking off from Ke nnedy Airport . After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, ‘Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles . The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax… OH, MY GOD!’
Silence followed, and after a few minutes, the captain came back on the intercom and said, ‘Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier. While I was talking to you, the flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!’
A passenger in Coach, Jay Johnson, yelled, ‘That’s nothing. You should see the back of mine!’